After a few quick scans
I’ve found it in myself
to put together a damage estimation,
And hold in my hands,
Some summons, subpoenas and citations.
Cracked two teeth on prickly pear pits,
Scuffed-up my running shoes which didn’t fit,
3 toes stubbed,
Forearms covered in thorns,
From when I tripped into the shrubs.
Bumps on my crown,
From fallen acorns,
During the post workout cool-down.
And bruised shins,
I think I just woke up with.
Would plead no contest,
But won’t bother showing up to my court date.
Placing myself on house arrest,
As my own harshest critic,
Judge, jury and executioner.