In the throes of
cost-benefit
analysis paralysis,
I change my mind.
Give me a nudge,
in the right direction,
just enough to budge,
and overcome the friction.
Pivot after pivot,
like I’m double-jointed,
but I’m too rigid
to be a contortionist.
In the midst of
figuring it all out,
I think twice.
I’ll come around again,
as I move along the bend.
In a moment of clarity I ask,
is this just how it is
forever, then?
I’ve begun to understand myself,
then I thought better of it.
Despite the flashiness,
try as it might,
lightning never strikes
the same place twice.
Power without focus
is just bluster.
Clocks, especially
the broken ones,
are much more consistent
than that.
But with nothing set in motion,
a steady hand
does not impress.
When the gears move synchronously
tooth-by-interlocking-tooth,
we can read deeply
into the kinesics.
To your horror
you may find
some things in common
with the automatons.
We all know the truth —
imitator,
yet another simulacra
lost in the wrong end
of the uncanny valley,
you tell yourself.
But who’s more convincing?
Please
don’t fret,
but
If you’re hoping that it
gets easier from here,
I’m sorry to say
it doesn’t.
Yet,
I appreciate your cooperation,
bear with me while I
get my life together.
Just because I’m a “smart device”
doesn’t mean I have all the answers.
I hope it doesn’t stay like this forever.
I’m spiraling but
I’ll find my way
someday —
I’m positive.
I’ll run a diagnostic.
Am I plugged in?
I seem to be.
Am I powered on?
Yes.
Am I obsolete?
Maybe.
Have I been corrupted?
Wouldn’t you like to know.
Here,
I’ll Google the problem for you.
One of us isn’t playing with a full deck.
Uhh,
pay no attention
to the blue screen.
Please call your service provider.
They’ll take it from here.
Thank you for choosing Dependable Computing!
Arranged meticulously,
posed purposefully,
captured faithfully —
life not as it happened,
but a skillful composition.
Sliced pomegranate,
with a few loose jewels nearby,
a vase full of poppies,
wine glasses half full,
a fresh loaf of bread
a steak knife flanking
an empty plate.
We stand on the outside
looking in,
a window to a moment,
forever undisturbed —
not life as it once was,
just an arrangement.
Take this with you,
only in memory,
no flash photography.
Stay with me, please.
You’re always on my mind.
I don’t care
when you go hide,
or wander far and wide,
scratch the curtains
or knock my glasses
off the table.
Take your time,
I know you’ll be back.
I feel you with me always,
When you’re nuzzled with me
I am stable
once again.
Stay with me please,
because you’re my friend.
I am tamed once I see you–
how little you do for me,
my favorite freeloader.
To every need, I will tend;
you can feed yourself,
bathe,
and live your life without me,
but I’ll do it all — all for you,
that’s what I choose.
Please stay,
you’re always on my mind.
We stand
In long shadows,
passing through,
passing through,
they’re silent
Wanderers,
adrift, going where they’re taken.
Currents in the void
have shifted;
you’ll never see them again.
Mutters echo softly,
barely audible,
across the way.
Look them in their eyes,
they will not acknowledge.
As surely as time flows,
they will not stay.
Who are you?
Who are you?
I cannot say.
No one knows,
but they all ask
the same of you.
Chack
Goes the cue ball,
as it breaks
the tenuous structure
at the start of the game.
We collected these balls,
and set them here
for specifically this purpose.
The purposive percussion,
can have unforeseen side effects,
such as scratches,
shouting matches
or, at worst,
the 8-ball finds a way
to lose you the whole affair.
But with precision and care,
the collisions
and chain reactions you hope for,
carry you through.
A game of pool revitalizes the night.
It brings joy and energy,
that escalates,
as each ball finds its way to a pocket,
out of sight
but not out of mind.
All from the predictable instability
at its outset.
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Winds of change,
carry me away,
I will spiral
as I ride the currents,
to still waters,
to green pastures.
The gale will wail,
but I will not falter,
it’s fury will take me
somewhere new,
I have faith.
I will put down roots,
I will stand as tall as I can,
from midsummer,
through first frost
but, here, I cannot stay.
Winds of change,
I will follow your lead,
I fear no obstacle,
you have carried me above them.
Though you have set me down,
I will not rest,
The sun sets in the West,
I will face East,
and take in the morning light,
no matter the hand I’m dealt.
Winds of change,
carry me away,
I wish to see the world,
carry me away.
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A light touch,
can really pluck
the heart strings.
My heart sings,
at the opportunity,
to practice with you.
But I, at times, am Icarus
too ambitious-
too inconsistent
with the placement of my fingers.
But vigorous no doubt,
My hope is that practice makes me perfect,
I can fine-tune this
day by day,
I just hope the neightbors
have nothing to say.
As they have their privacy,
so do we,
we’ll keep our sour notes
and symphonies,
all to ourselves.
Your wildest dreams
are sweet relief,
a cease to endless wandering,
rest for your weary mind.
And rest you try to do
but release eludes.
Your alarm clock shows
the lapsing night,
instinct tells you
there’s more to do
but even the sun rests now
and today, for you,
is not yet through.
The moon watches,
Tantalus of the night,
sharing your affliction,
stillness surrounds
but it never partakes.
It chases the sun,
shape-shifting,
with a glint always in its eye,
but never does the moon
bask in the light.
Relief,
you hope,
is soon to come,
you lay your head
on your pillow
and fade away
for a moment,
“Good morning New Jersey!
Today’s forecast is 72 degrees,
sunny with low humidity.”
If only the new day,
could wait
until tomorrow.
The File Pile 